PATH: BS | Media | Television

Tonight on Larry King: Avoiding Insurance Scams

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[Television]
If you're Larry King, doing an hour-long TV interview with a celebrity or a central figure in a news story (a fireman fighting the California wildfires! a 9/11 widow! a murderer's brother!) every week night, you ought to eventually, in your 70-something years of life, learn a few basics about human nature.
  • Celebrities who collapse from "exhaustion" are exhausted from too much booze and drugs.

  • People who are accused of a crime will always claim innocence.

  • There is no free lunch.

  • If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.


Unfortunately, it seems that ol' Larry didn't learn those last two life-lessons very well. At least, not judging by his lawsuit against an insurance company for "breach of fiduciary responsibility."

READ MORE | 5 comments since 2008-04-22 10:49:26 | Comment on this Article

It's Like American Idol But With Renal Failure

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[Television]
Being terminally ill is not, I think we can all agree, fun. Being confronted with one's own mortality is pretty much universally loathed, especially in the wasting fashion of most terminal diseases. You know what would make ME feel a whole lot better about the whole process of watching the curtain slowly fall on my own little play? Picking who gets my kidneys when I finally kick the bucket.

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Pharmaceutical Companies Propose "Drug TV" Channel

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[Television]
Amid strenuous lobbying across Europe to end restrictions on direct-to-consumer drug advertising, four pharmaceutical companies are considering launching their own television station. Johnson & Johnson, Pfizer, Novartis and Procter & Gamble envision "Pharma TV" as "a dedicated interactive digital channel funded by the industry with health news and features. "

With less regulation in America, why haven't they proposed their own channel here? Ponder that while you wait in line for your medication for restless leg syndrome, chronic fatigue, fingernail fungus, erectile disfunction and dry eyes.

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NewsFlash: Television Makes You Stupid

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[Television]
[Edumakashun]
The results are in from a 20-year study: Teenagers who watch several hours of television a day do worse at school and are less likely to graduate than their peers.

The good news is, this isn't a bad thing. Maybe I can get my fries a little faster with more of you guys working at McDonald's?

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Top Gear In America

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[Television]
[Sociology]
What happens when the offbeat British car show, "Top Gear" comes to America? The challenge starts with the three hosts landing in Miami and having to each purchase a vehicle for $1000 and drive it all the way to New Orleans.

Watch the BBC show online and you'll quickly understand why something like this will never air on American television. There are a few moments that make "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" look like a Sunday drive.

READ MORE | 3 comments since 2007-04-14 10:47:41 | Comment on this Article

Welcome to Alabama Top Gear!

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[Hippies]
[Television]
When the English car show "Top Gear" decides to have a little fun with a road race through the state of Alabama, and as a side bet, each of the three participants gets to decorate the other's car with phrases designed to incite the locals, they get a dose of terrorism, American redneck style.

READ MORE | 6 comments since 2009-07-11 14:13:53 | Comment on this Article

Fox Displays Family-Style Sportsmanship During Saints Game

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[Mean People]
[Television]
During the NFL playoff game last Saturday FOX producers choose to show a poignant shot of a passionate Saints fan. Most of us were really puzzled as to why the network would do such a thing. This isn't exactly an accident... a camera was positioned and someone switched to that camera. A self-righteous network like Fox has some 'splainin' to do.

UPDATE: Maxim is now looking for Heather to do a photo shoot!

READ MORE | 2 comments since 2007-01-16 16:43:18 | Comment on this Article

Education Secretary Lost on Jeopardy

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[Television]
The first Cabinet-level government official to appear on Jeopardy came in second place to an actor. Secretary Margaret Spellings beat out CSI:NY actor Hill Harper to place second after This Is Spinal Tap actor Michael McKean. It is unclear whether she is going to get a home version of the game (or if Alex Trebek is going to be audited). So Lenny from LaVerne and Shirley beat a Cabinet secretary. I think Fox is going to have a special where Squiggy fights his weight in ferrets to the death.

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"Dog" Bounty Hunter Arrested After Jumping Bail

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[Television]
TV reality star Duane ''Dog'' Chapman and two co-stars on his show were arrested Thursday in Hawaii on charges of illegal detention and conspiracy in the bounty hunters' capture three years ago of a cosmetics company heir.

Chapman's son Leland, 29, and Timothy Chapman, 41, assist Chapman in exploits chronicled for the TV show around the Hawaiian Islands. The show focuses on Chapman's family as much as the bounty hunting, which generally involves tracking down bail jumpers, often creating emotional scenes with repentant captives.

Charges have been pending against the three since local police in Mexico arrested them shortly after they roped in Luster. They posted bail but allegedly never returned to Puerto Vallarta for their court hearing on July 15, 2003..

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What Everyone Needs--An Outdoor TV

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[Diamond Studded Toenail Clippers]
[Television]
Finally, the manufacturers of America fill the gaping hole in everyone's day when we might not be exposed to TV, by introducing a television set for the outdoors.

Yes, that's right. Now you can actually get fresh air and sunshine while sitting on your butt glued to the tube. It's not like exercise, or actually paying attention to your friends and family, but let's face it, those guys are boring, right?

Watch TV while you barbecue. Catch the big game while half-heartedly playing catch with the kids. Enjoy the sounds of nature drowned out by the sounds of lawn mowers, leaf blowers, and now, the neighbor's SunbriteTV! You can even watch it in the rain, in subfreezing conditions, or during the most intense summer heat wave.

What are you waiting for? Don't you already have a TV in every room in the house and one in your car to keep the kids quiet? Fill that empty space in your yard and your soul!

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