PATH: BS | PT Barnum

New Orleans Mayor Proposes Gambling As Solution To City Problems

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Mayor Ray Nagin called Friday for Las Vegas-style gambling in hurricane-hit New Orleans in a desperate attempt to quickly heal its battered lifeblood industry -- tourism. "Now is the time for us to think out of the box," Nagin said.

Wonderful news. If you haven't lost everything already, you can do so in any downtown hotel.

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Convicted Fraudster Scores Big With Best Selling Book

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[Faulty Products]
He went to prison for fraud and was ordered by the U.S. government to stop touting health products on infomercials, but Kevin Trudeau's book "Natural Cures 'They' Don't Want You to Know About" is a bestseller.

The book -- whose back cover says "Never get sick again!" and "Learn the specific natural cures for herpes, acid reflux, diabetes ... cancer ... and more!" -- has topped the Publishers Weekly nonfiction bestseller list for the past three weeks.

Ok, what is with you people? This guy has hawked every gimmicky product he could scam on people for the last decade, from speed reading courses to diet and "cure-all" pills. WTF? Who's buying this crap?

READ MORE | 2 comments since 2006-05-06 14:06:06 | Comment on this Article

Top Ten Dot-Com Flops

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CNet has an interesting article on the top 10 dot-com business flops of all time. It's of particular amusement to us, because this site is running on a server we purchased at a liquidation auction from the company listed as #5.

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Stop Your Cat from Surfing for Kitty Porn

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How many times has this happened to you? You leave your computer to grab a cup of coffee or to pay the pizza guy. While you're up, your cat Fluffy Bottom hops up onto the desk and does the foxtrot right on your keyboard. When you get back to the computer, you find that your document is full of clever phrases like "okkkklllllllllklklklklk," your operating system is now Linux, and you seem to have ordered 500 pounds of catnip from Ebay.

What you need is Pawsense, the cat-guarding software!

READ MORE | 3 comments since 2005-08-14 18:50:07 | Comment on this Article

We're Not Afraid?

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[Vanity]
The latest Internet fad comes in the wake of the London bombings. A new web site, werenotafraid.com has popped up encouraging people to post images expressing this sentiment.

For the bravest of visitors, the site sells a plethora of "We're Not Afraid" merchandise, including the daring, "We're Not Afraid" T-Shirt, so you can parade around the mall declaring your sense of personal security to everyone else. The site's authors have even graciously decided to donate an ambiguous portion of their revenue to the Red Cross.

Look for these peoples' next web project: WeAreNotFat-WeAreJustBigBoned.com.

READ MORE | 1 comment since 2005-07-15 12:27:38 | Comment on this Article

Latest Obesity Gimmick: The Stomach Pacemaker

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So you're overweight and the All-Mayonnaise-Diet doesn't seem to be working as advertised? Well, fret no more, there's another new gimmick on the horizon: The Transneuronix Implantable Gastric Stimulation system is like a pacemaker for the belly. Implanted into the abdomen, it zaps nerves in the stomach to make you think you're full.

How about a device that zaps you in the head if you contemplate buying into another stupid diet gimmick?

I'm obviously missing out on the bandwagon here, so I want to announce my own new "weight loss system". It's called the BSAlert Diet(tm). You send me all your money; that way your broke ass won't be able to binge on Snackwells. Trust me, this works.

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Spray on Mud

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So you've been driving your escalade to and from the mall each day and you're worried about losing your "street cred?" Well, before you visit Talbot's again, why not apply some "Spray on Mud" to your vehicle to give it that authentic, "I-actually-use-my-SUV-for-the purpose-it-was-designed" look?

READ MORE | 2 comments since 2005-06-19 02:17:35 | Comment on this Article

"Entrepeneur" Funds His Start-Up With Gambling Revenue

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Apparently if there's one thing this entrepreneur likes to do more than run his own software company, it's gamble online. This one is apparently so confident of his gambling prowess, the three employees of his startup company have been playing online poker in lieu of collecting paychecks.

Now there's an entrepeneur who will undoubtedly offer little or no risk to investors in his venture. Where do I sign up?

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eBay, Western Union Becoming Scam Accomplices of Choice

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[Get-Rich-Quick]
Most of the online scams that are running these days involve duping the gullible consumer into using Western Union to wire money to various parties. In a new twist, ebay auctions are being set up as a launching pad for more scams using Western Union.

It's about time that people begin to realize that if someone asks you to wire them money, especially with Western Union (who does virtually nothing to help people who have been scammed using their resources), you should just say no. Stop using Western Union.

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Virgin Mary Shows Up Under Chicago Highway

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Hundreds of people are now flocking to a Chicago expressway underpass to view a salt stain some say looks like the virgin Mary. Doesn't it seem more likely if the image was legit it would be Lot's wife?

It's nice to know that God thinks the world is in such great shape he has time to manifest "miracles" of this nature.

READ MORE | 6 comments since 2005-06-18 20:21:03 | Comment on this Article

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