Daily Show Guide To Mid-Term Elections

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[Humor]
We dug up an old video clip from 2002 describing how mid-term elections work. Watch as TDS does their own spin on School House Rock to tell the truth about the institution of government.




 

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Terrorism Hypocrisy

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A man who worked for the CIA and is now being held by the U.S. on immigration charges is known to have planned the bombing of a Cubana (Cuban airline) flight that killed all 73 passengers. Despite this, Luis Posada Carriles will not be classified by our government as a terrorist and deported to Cuba. Bush has said, "We will make no distinction between the terrorists who committed these acts and those who harbor them." So what does that say about us?

Posada was on the CIA payroll in the 60's and was trained by the U.S. Army for the oh-so-botched Bay of Pigs Invasion. He is also known to have received payment from anti-Castro groups to perform anti-Communist terrorist acts in Mexico. The government's own files indicate that Posada was one of the principal culprits of the Cubana bombing (along with one Orlando Bosch, who has been harbored by the U.S. since 1988). Our inability to put our money where our mouth is regarding terrorists of all stripes is, well, damning BS.

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Electronic Voting Gets Punk'd

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[Technology]
Electronic voting machines may be worse than hanging chads. A Dutch anti-electronic voting group demonstrated how easy it is to actually steal votes from one group and assign them to another with only brief access to the machines before an election. They were even able to get one machine to play chess!

90% of Dutch elections use the devices (Nedap machines), and the story came out on the evening news--a scandal is a-brewin' in Holland. Meanwhile, on our own shores, more and more problems are being discovered with the voting machines used here. Most recently, a group of voters in San Francisco sued Alameda county to block the use of the new voting machines there.

The Dutch Anti-Electronic Voting Group

The San Francisco Story

 

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Screw Up Malay And Pay

Posted by ueberbill (3784 views) Add this story to MyYahoo Add this article to del.icio.us Submit article to Reddit Add story to Furl Add story to StumbleUpon [E-Mail link]

[Tourism]
[Humor]
Malaysia (which not even MALAYSIANs can point to on a map) is now going to levy fines on its citizens for using the national language (Malay) incorrectly. A special division will go after offenders who mix Malay and English (Malinglish? Engalay? Manglish?).

Fines of up to 1,000 ringgit ($271) may be imposed for offenses. The move is to keep the national language as pure as possible. Most Malaysians speak both Malay and English, and critics say this measure will hurt global competitiveness.

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What Is Wrong With The Japanese?

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[The "Buzz"]
[Video]
Seriously, I am desperately trying to understand this culture, but, WTF... this video defies description.




 

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Media Continues To Mislabel Foley & Hastert

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[News Media]
What happens when your political party seems to be completely filled with pedophiles and those who protect them? What can you do with an election looming?

If you're the sleazy, irresponsible mainstream media, you can do what Associated Press, Fox, and others have done--claim these scumbags are Democrats and hope it sticks.

You know things are bad for the Republican party--whenever one of them gets in trouble, their friends in the "liberal media" label them as being Democrats! Foley is a Republican!



Meanwhile there's now a lot of heat on Foley after he claimed he was abused by a priest when he was young (Foley Excuse #312). People are now demanding that he name the priest who, if he is still alive, may have continued to abuse children. No word if Foley is desperately trying to find some old phone books to randomly pick out someone.

And as if it couldn't get worse, ABC has breaking news that three more former congressional pages have come forward to reveal what they call "sexual approaches" over the Internet from former Congressman Mark Foley.

"I was seventeen years old and just returned to [my home state] when Foley began to e-mail me, asking if I had ever seen my page roommates naked and how big their penises were," said the page in the 2002 class.

The former page also said Foley told him that if he happened to be in Washington, D.C., he could stay at Foley's home if he "would engage in oral sex" with Foley.




Here's Keith Olbermann's complete outline:



 

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Al Qaeda Urges Staying The Course

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[Military]
A recently translated letter from Al Qaeda's high command to its Iraqi counterparts (division? department?) says that prolonging the Iraq war is in its (that's Al Qaeda's) best interest. So right now the biggest proponents of staying the course in Iraq are Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Bin Laden, and Al Zarqawi.

The letter (linked below) offers support for the Iraq operations and says that even if they had less than half the number of attacks that were being carried out now their efforts would still be a success. The letter says the most important thing is that the jihad in Iraq continue and that God willing (their words), the war in Iraq will continue.

The Letter

 

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Study Shows Daily Show Has As Much News As "Real" News Programs

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[News Media]
[Entertainment]
The Daily Show is much funnier than traditional newscasts, but a new study from Indiana University says it has the same amount of meat on its bones when it comes to coverage of the news. The brand of news coverage Jon Stewart and the rest of The Daily Show's staff brings to the airwaves is just as substantive as traditional news programs like World News Tonight and the CBS Evening News.

Most of us think the Daily Show is a lot more informative than all mainstream news.

The researchers looked at coverage of the 2004 Democratic and Republican national conventions and the first presidential debate of the fall campaign, all of which were covered by the mainstream broadcast news outlets and The Daily Show. Individual broadcasts of the nightly news and corresponding episodes of The Daily Show were analyzed by the researchers, who found that the "average amounts of video and audio substance in the broadcast network news stories" were no different from The Daily Show. Perhaps more telling, The Daily Show delivered longer stories on the topic.

"It should be noted that the broadcast network news stories about the presidential election were significantly shorter, on average, than were The Daily Show with Jon Stewart stories," said Professor Fox. "The argument could be made that while the amount of substance per story was not significantly different, the proportion of each story devoted to substance was greater in the network news stories ... On the other hand, the proportion of stories per half hour program devoted to the election campaign was greater in The Daily Show."

Using the entire half-hour programs as the basis of analysis yielded the same results: there was just as much substance to The Daily Show's coverage as there was on the network news. And The Daily Show was much funnier, with less of the hype—references to photo ops, political endorsements, and polls—that typically overshadows substantive coverage on network news, according to the study.

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Stick Another Ribbon On Your SUV

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[Video]
Here's an absolutely hilarious, poignant and well done parody of Tony Orlando's famous song, performance live. Check it out!



 

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Next Vacation--Try Iran's Nuclear Reactors

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[Tourism]
Iran is going to open up its nuclear facilities to "foreign tourists" due to an order issued by Pres. Ahmadinejad. The law is an effort to prove that the facilities are aimed at generating fuel and not weapons. This is probably a trip you won't get through Orbitz.

The law would require American citizens to be fingerprinted upon entering Iran (retaliation for the same requirement for Iranians entering the U.S.). Presumably not all facilities will be available to tourists, and although this will probably play great in Tehran, it of course doesn't prove that they aren't generating weapons-grade materials in secret (read: "No Tourists Allowed") facilities. Plus, I would imagine the NSA, CIA, and FBI would be all over the mail, e-mail, phone conversations, and frequent flyer miles of someone who actually WENT to Iran to visit its nuclear facilities.

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